Sims

Last night I stayed up until almost 5am playing the Sims 3. Upon first starting out my "household" as they call it, I made two young adults, being me and boyfriend. Within the first three days of our new life together with a three bedroom house which I had bought with our amazing endless "motherlode" cheat (allowing endless money), our dishwasher broke. Being the man, I had boyfriend repair it. Since his "handiness" skill was only at a level 1 at the time, he was electrocuted. I ha,d him try again in an attempt to improve his handiness skill and he was electrocuted once more. My boyfriend within our first three days had died. I put his remains in our backyard next to the pool and mourned for three days.

Reading about the Sims online (yes, I research), I found out that you could build a relationship with the ghost of a loved one, but you do have to start from scratch and actually "woohoo" and try to make a baby. So I fucked up my Sims sleep schedule so that she would sleep during the day, be grumpy going into work at her scientist job, and drink lots of coffee so she could build a romantic relationship with dead boyfriend. Eventually I became pregnant and I now have a ghost baby. I quit my job as a scientist, but I'm sure I could go back once my child is grown up and goes to school. Either way, the reason I stayed up until 5am is because I wanted to see if my baby would be a little goth half ghost kid. Nope. Harlequinn (Yes, I named her that, only upon a recent conversation with actual boyfriend that he wanted to name our future daughter this) enjoys classical music, her favorite color is spiceberry, and her favorite food is mac and cheese. She has a given artistic talent and is afraid of water, which is taking after her father. Maybe once she grows older I'll edit her and make her a goth kid and slightly ghost-like just for my own satisfaction and since I put in the effort of staying up until 5am just to see what this chap looked like.

What I'm trying to say is, I'm a dork. I wish I could quit my job and have a life cheat with unlimited free money. Oh, and my sim is super athletic, which I'm getting towards myself in the physical form. I also ordered the new Insanity workout, which I shall receive in 3-5 business days. I'm excited! I've already lost a total of 17 pounds and have approximately 30 more pounds to go. I'm determined and looking for something challenging with a workout. Yay! 

Babies

I want a baby. Not in that, "I want someone to love me unconditionally" way, but that I want to be a mother. I want to have a human being that I created with my partner, future husband, my love. I want that love to be combined into making a beautiful human being. I want to have a child as give it all the love I have to offer. To partner up with its father and show it the beauty of the world, but make aware of the evil. I want to give it what I never had. I want to show it to my mother and father and see that happiness in them. I want to be a mother because I know that out of everything I will do in life, that will be the highlight. I know I'll be a great mother.
You want to know why I know? Because I have Respect for my vagina. I'm not the girl who sleeps with a guy just because he called me pretty. I've never been that girl that you'll see at the club or bar or to "experience." That may seem naive of me, but it's never really been a need that I've felt. I've always found love, and that was most important. I know that I wouldn't be fit right now financially to be the mother I imagine I can be. I work in a call center and have an associates degree in general studies. That amounts to nothing. I realize that I need to take care of myself before considering taking care of another human being.
I just know that it's coming soon. That in the near future, once everything is planned out (or nearly there), I'll be a mother. I seriously cannot wait.

I Understand.

For all of you before me, I understand.
Why you left, I understand.
For the ones who said he was immature, I understand.
For the ones who couldn't tolerate his family, I understand.
For the ones who cheated because you weren't happy, I understand.
For the ones who lied, I understand.
For the arguments, the excommunication, for the negative comments, I understand.
But just because I understand doesn't mean I'll do the same.
I'm here now.
His "immaturity" is a child like nature that I love and laugh at.
His family is close and tight, and when they love you, you'll never second guess it.
Infidelity is never a solution to unhappiness. We've been through hard times and I didn't know where we stood, and had the opportunity, but he was more important.
Lying only builds a deeper hole and only hurts in the end. All of our secrets are shared.
Arguments with him are endless until you give up, he's so stubborn. But after my time with him, there are hardly any arguments, no negative words, and I never excommunicate the one who has given me so much love all for one fight.
My patience has proved me worthy and long lasting. I have invested my whole heart in someone I've known from the start would treat it with care, knowing the delicacy of such a fragile thing. I've become part of a loving family who hasn't welcomed me with open arms, but has enough faith to forgive me and for that I'll be forever grateful. Through both of our pain, we have found something so much greater than what we expected.
So for all of those before me, I'm sorry for your loss. Because I've found the love of my life.

An Introduction.

So basically this is where I start off telling you, the reader, about myself. I don't think one little entry will fully explain my personality and my little quirks, but I'll try.
My name is Amanda, hear me roar. I'm pretty average as far as height and weight go. I have blue eyes, and naturally light brown hair color, but I haven't seen my real hair in years. It changes constantly. I have an odd fashion sense, and I try to keep in style as much as I can, however being unemployed makes you stick to yoga pants most of the time. I love the colors purple and yellow. They're happy colors. I smile a lot and try to stay optimistic most of the time. I'm into the tattoo/piercing world. I love hair and makeup and try to stay up to date with those trends as well. I'm a nerd and will try to learn anything and everything about anything and everything. My favorite game series is The Legend of Zelda. Because money is tight, I'm just getting around to playing Twilight Princess.
Those are just a few tidbits about me, as more will come along in the process of my blog. My main objective with this is that I, like so many Americans, am unemployed. I live near Martinsville, Virginia which has the highest unemployment rate in the state, that rate being 16.7 percent in December 2011. It's quite noticeable once you get in the city and surrounding areas. There are many buildings, factories, and old businesses that now have boarded up their windows throughout the area. These factories and businesses were mainly Tultex and furniture factories that were bought out and outsourced to foreign countries. Going through the city, there are hints that it was actually a desirable place to live. Intricate buildings uptown and on main street. Like many towns and cities that had these factories and businesses, we had potential. It's sad because this is my home, and having no job and surviving barely on unemployment benefits until I find a job, there's really no way out. I've applied to so many places since November of 2011 that I could probably recite my resume and work history in my sleep. Basically the purpose of this blog is to let you, the reader, know that if you are unemployed or having hardships in your life, you're not alone. I'll post different tips I have discovered as far as job opportunities, shopping tips, relationship advice, fashion, different stories from my life, and basically what is requested of me. There's more to come. :)